Discrimination

Britain's MI5 discriminates against tall spies (by Martin Wainright, in the Guardian):

Ignoring the imposing stature of all five actors who have played James Bond, recruiters plan to operate the equivalent of a funfair ride measurement check. Short-listed men are likely to go no further if they top 5ft 11in; women if they stand taller than the 5ft 8in of MI5's current director, Eliza Manningham-Buller.

The warning is part of the ancient spying tradition of 'bland is beautiful', based on the theory that the best agents blend as boringly as possible into their surroundings.

In Bond's exotic world, the 6ft-plus of Sean Connery, George Lazenby, Roger Moore, Timothy Dalton and Pierce Brosnan arguably meets this criterion. However, real-life spies spend less time in casinos, luxury hotels and private pools.

The agency advises on its application forms: 'You should be able to blend into the background. We are looking for average height, build, appearance.'

Alas, I am too tall to blend into the background.